Hannah St. James 1/19/25 Hannah St. James 1/19/25

Rooted In Resilience

On this day I woke up and saw my world had been uprooted (physically & metaphorically). As a person who has endured huge chasms of loss and displacement, the visual of uprooted trees all over my community filled me with dread, grief and awe. Hurricane Helene.

An overwhelming sense of panic began to grow as I attempted to get food for my two children. The unsettled energy radiating from others was palpable. Relief!! We’re 4 towns over, still no traffic lights, but people are gathering and being vocal and encouraging and there’s a food truck.

It’s been 15 minutes in the queue, and I’m next in line. I hear, “So sorry we just ran out”. Immediate panic. This was the 3rd time we’d ventured out and the 2nd time we barely got out of the maze of downed trees.

I decided we can’t stay here. On the way back home, we incorrectly ended up in the next state over since GPS and cell service were nil. As we packed our things, I kept thinking about everything we’d been through just to get here! I NEEDED this to work out. Although we safely made it to shelter in Atlanta, the panic attacks were only beginning. 11 days later they’d show up after being on hold with FEMA (multiple times) for an hour and the line hangs up. When the rent was due and LATE. When the money I used to get us shelter and food was QUICKLY running out. When I got biopsy results that meant surgery in a few weeks. And again, when my engine blew. (I honestly could keep going.)

School started for my littles again, but I still couldn’t sleep. My resources were extremely limited, I had no safety net (we JUST moved) I couldn’t get enough rest, AND I had to figure it out. The world did not stop, neither did the bills. No mercy, the ship was sinking but as our ancestors know, the will to love and be free to live is in the DNA. I was going to make it come hell or high water. I am loved. I am safe. I am supported.

Day after day, passing by these uprooted trees, seeing the homes crushed beneath them was painful to my soul. When I heard about the bodies being found as roots were unearthed all through the Carolinas, I cried. My soul could feel the anguish and sadness and pain. I could never fathom the level of cruelty required to mock someone and have a meal as they were beaten and tortured WHILE being hung from a rope by the neck. I did what I always do when I don’t understand. I read. I research.

The more I read, the more I grieved. As I began to grieve the lives stolen, the opportunities to breathe violently snatched away, something unexpected happened. I also began to celebrate. One can never escape the TRUTH. You can choose to ignore it, but we ALL have agency.

I choose to honor my ancestors by creating more art, nurturing my family, and living a life of joy, love, and ease. A revolutionary life. One that shows despite the circumstances, faith, curiosity, and creativity will lay the foundations for our new world. As our good nap bishop Tricia Hersey has proclaimed, “We will REST!” I celebrate their sacrifice and resilience in the face of horror and terrorism with my art, my determination, and with my joy.

Coming down from this elevated place of stress to feel safe again took months, and truthfully, I’m still making my way to safety in my body and circumstances. Thankfully as an artist, my healing comes from creating and experiencing art.

Experiencing an exhibit of Spartanburg artist Winston Wingo’s work made me exhale in a way that released an angst I could never put a name to. As a black woman in America, of British and Jamaican descent, to thrive I had integrated a general lens of wariness in my perceptions.

The relief of seeing us solidified with such great permanence in the future gave me a doorway to live out loud creatively and with joy. It affirmed me in my efforts to encourage others to do the same.

We are resilient because we KNOW that we will remain. Once you can recognize AND utilize the tools you have as resources, you will begin to understand that you too, are resilient.

All you have is all you need and as life keeps lifing, check the facts. You’re here at this point. You made it. You said “NO, I will not give up”. You… Me… We… are rooted in resilience and that’s on our ancestors.

We got this!

Hannah St. James 5/28/19 Hannah St. James 5/28/19

The Coming Light

A Study In Perspective

Life is all about perspective.

Is it an oncoming train? or is it a rescue? Is it a warm fire? Or is the house burning down?

It happens the way it happens. Every shift in mindset comes with 20/20 hindsight.

This is the first time I’m tracking an inspired collection LIVE based on some clarifying experiences.

The last two weeks I’ve been LABORING and internally almost torturing myself to work on some content. I had my assignment, and realistically it wasn’t a hard ask.

I hadn’t left space for the integration. I knew what I had to do conceptually. It all made sense, but the next step that HAD to happen was integration. This has been on my to do list for 3 weeks now. A bold and domineering task for some reason. The integration is the space between. The time between when the seed is planted and germination. What I tend to do in that season is berate myself for all I should’ve done, or what I should’ve known.

I still got here! Precisely, to the opportunity to observe the process of my inspiration. My lesson learned: “Trust that it will happen again. Trust that the opportunity you’re ready for is what’s coming.”

Instead of being hard on yourself, in the meantime prepare. It’s ok to not know the how. Put it in action by preparing because it’s coming. Every day is brand new, and the gift of life is an opportunity to be inspired.

Put that bow ON. Get cute & Get Inspired!